Víte, co mám společného s hromadou lidí? Ignoruju informační e-maily. Ne proto, že bych se bála, že mi třeba banka pošle fakturu jako špatný vtip, ale prostě proto, že přijde milion mailů denně, a tyhle sdělení alá „změna smluvních podmínek“ mě v dnešním uspěchaném světě většinou akorát tak uspí. No, a tak jsem se na jeden takový e-mail vykašlala.
Chyba. První leden, všude pohoda, klídek, novoroční předsevzetí (která už asi nevyjdou), a já zjistím, že moje máma, která je disponentem mého účtu (proč vlastně, už ani nevím), najednou vidí všechny moje peníze. A co víc, může s nima i manipulovat. Začínají se mi klasicky potit dlaně, nervozita stoupá: v tu chvíli jsem viděla živé obrazy: máma nakupuje sadu hrnců od nějakého pochybnýho prodavače, protože „tohle prostě MUSÍM mít, rozumíš?!“ Samozřejmě to byla víkendová záležitost, takže volání do banky jsem, ač nerada, odložila na pondělí.
Když jsem se konečně dovolala, paní na druhém konci drátu si neodpustila výtku: „No vidíte, tohle všechno bylo v tom e-mailu. Čtěte příště maily!“ Jasně, díky, Sherlocku. A pak ještě dodala něco jako: „Buďte ráda, že je to vaše máma, a ne třeba ex-přítel.“ Smála jsem se s ní, haha, dobrý vtípek. Jenže pak jsem si sedla k účtu, abych mámu smazala, dle návodu od milé bankovní asistenky. Procházím si disponenty, a co nevidím? Disponent číslo jedna: máma. Disponent číslo dva: … zatajený dech … můj bejvalej. Jasně, už jsem úplně zapomněla, že tam zůstal. V tu chvíli mi prolétlo hlavou: „No snad mi s těma dvěma stovkama, co mám na účtu, nezařizuje výlet na Bali.“ Naštěstí to dobře dopadlo. Máma nic nenakoupila, ex nic neprošustroval a já si všechno krásně smazala.
A došlo mi, že můj táta je prostě frajer. Bankám nevěří, žádný internetový bankovnictví nepoužívá a mobil má jen na telefonování. Kdyby mohl, nosil by prachy v ponožce. A víte co? Tohle by se mu asi nikdy nestalo.
Jak to máte vy? Máte internet banking v mobilu? Nebo jste ti frajeři, co platí prstenem? Podělte se, ať vím, že v tom nejsem sama. 
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The bit about finding a forgotten ex still listed as a disponent is the part that stuck with me, because it shows the problem isn’t just ignoring emails but never auditing who has access. A practical step: once a quarter, open the disponent settings and check every name against who actually needs access now, removing anyone inactive immediately. Also set a calendar reminder for the day before any announced change to terms takes effect, so the email gets read before it silently applies.
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